Extra, Extra, Read All About It!

My latest doctor's appointment, that is. :)

I went in this morning for another u/s and b/w. I'm such a slow stimmer...doesn't seem to matter the meds or doses. He wants me to stim for one more day, and I'll go back in tomorrow morning. I had one follicle that was ahead of the others. He wants the others to grow a little more, so we can hopefully get an egg out of each one. If the follicle is too small or immature, they are unable to flush out the egg on retrieval day. He said that we needed to discuss assisted hatching, the closer we get to transfer day. For those of you who aren't sure of what assisted hatching is...it's where they 'help the embryos out'. They stick a needle into the outer shell of the embryo, creating a small hole. This begins the hatching process, before putting them back inside the uterus. They recommend assisted hatching for women who've had trouble with implantation. Obviously, I'm a candidate, with two failed cycles under my belt. Did any of you use assisted hatching in your IVF cycles? Looks like trigger shot will be Sunday evening, making retrieval Tuesday. I'll know for sure after tomorrow's appointment. I'm so excited, girls! I gave this baby thing to God, a long time ago. I trust Him with it. I trust Him with my heart 100%. No matter what, He and I are tight...BFFs :)

In other news...I ask you to say a prayer for Sara & Me. We have our first meeting, tomorrow, with the owner of the boutique that wants to carry our jewelry. I'm sure we'll be a little nervous, the closer it gets to 2:30. :)

Have a blessed weekend, y'all!

Love you guys,
Jill

Stick it in your eyeball!

I was up and ready to go to the doctor's office, a little after 7am, this morning. Ugh. I'm so not a morning person. I had to make it an early appointment though, because me and my sis are catering this week. Today was the last day and we had so much fun working together. We were asked for business cards, this week, so I'm hoping we'll be working/cooking together on a more regular basis! Anywho, back to the doctor's visit. I have 10 follicles!! This is more than my last IVF, so I'm very pleased. Everyone keeps telling me, those shots in the rear must have worked. ha! I was the laughing stock of the doctor's office, this morning. I told me doctor, "I was giving myself IM injections, instead of subQ." He responded, "I heard." *with a big grin on his face* My nurse called today to give me a hard time. Conversation went a little something like this...

Me: "This is Jill"

Nurse L: "Hey, Jill...I was just calling to give you your lab results and to check and see where Alex was giving you the shots today." *laughing into the phone*

Me: "We decided to try my upper thigh...think that's a good place?"

Nurse L: "I was thinking directly in your eyeball...that should yield good results."

Me: *laughing hysterically*

Nurse L: "I'm requesting to be your & Alex's retrieval nurse...I want to give Alex the option of doing the retrieval himself, since he's a doctor and all."

Me: *laughing hysterically*

I love my doctor's office. Luckily, I can laugh at myself and love that they've had such a good time with this one. :)

My E2 levels were up...they doubled, since my last b/w. All of the follicles were pretty much the same size, none that were way bigger or way smaller. Dr. B said that was good. I'm going to stim for two more days and then go in on Saturday for another U/S and bloodwork. Retrieval could be as soon as Monday!

Just wanted to give everyone an update and I hope you're all having a fabulous week!

Love to all,
Jill

Insane In The Membrane...

Me: "I just wanted to see if I could come in and get marked...Alex is afraid that he's giving me the shot in the wrong place, because it's hurting so bad."

Nurse: "Get marked?"

Me: "Yes, you guys have marked my backside before, to make sure the shot is given in the right spot."

Nurse: "Jill, where is Alex giving you the shots?"

Me: "In my backside...like I do all of my IM injections."

Nurse: "Jill, the stims are supposed to be in your stomach along with your lupron...what are you and Alex doing over there?"

Me: "Playing doctor."

*laughing on both ends of the phone*

I have lost my mind, people. I've been having Alex give my stims injections, into my backside with this...

When I was supposed to be putting them in my stomach with this...

Luckily, my E2 levels have gone up and the meds are working, despite the fact that they've been going directly into the muscle in my backside. I felt so stupid, but couldn't stop laughing. Poor Alex...he has held me every night, because I've cried after every shot. Granted, I'll have to do IM's once transfer is here, but I could have saved myself a sore rear-end for another week or so!

INSANE IN THE BRAIN!

A blessed weekend...

I just wanted to thank all of you, who prayed for the marriage retreat, this past weekend. Alex and I walked away from it feeling so blessed to spend a weekend with these precious couples. There was a couple there who had only been married one week. They were always holding hands and she would sit in his lap. It was the cutest thing. Many shared their stories, their struggles, as well as the miracles God had performed in their marriages. We laughed, we cried, we prayed for one another, we encouraged one another...God definitely showed up and it was a blessed weekend!

When we arrived home on Saturday, we both crashed. We were exhausted on so many levels. It was such an emotional weekend (in a good way) and we needed rest. We took a long nap and just stayed in for the rest of the evening. We also did my first stims injection on Saturday night. This is a pic of the big nasty needle that I get stuck with every evening.



It hurt. I cried. I haven't cried from the pain of a shot in a LONG time. We mixed 8 vials of medicine and put it in one syringe (as directed by the nurse).



It sent my right leg into a charley horse. My hip is still hurting. The second night, Alex lessened the amount of sodium chloride mixed with the meds. It went much better. I may keep taking them in my left side, until my right recovers from that first shot. I go back to the clinic, tomorrow, so we'll see how these new drugs are working. :)

I received an email (over the weekend) that made me cry tears of joy. Another blog friend (that actually goes to my same clinic), just found out that her first IVF worked...she's pregnant!! In regards to my weekend, this news was the cherry on top of my sundae! Several months back, I feel like God told me that my blog is not just a place to share our story. He told me to dedicate special time each day, in praying for others going through IF and to encourage them whenever possible. Since doing so, it has made my journey through infertility so much sweeter. I'm not only waiting in hopeful anticipation for God to answer Alex's and my prayers for a baby...I'm waiting for Him to answer my prayers for you, as well. So get ready...because like my friend, CR said, I'm believing that 2009 is our year, girls! :)

I leave you with pics of this little guy. He makes me smile and I love him to pieces!





Happy Monday!

Love to all,
Jill

Honest Scrap...

I was nominated by Mel for the following award...thanks, girl! :)



The rules for Honest Scrap are:

1) Choose a minimum of 7 blogs that you find brilliant in content or design.

2) Show the 7 winners names and links on your blog, and leave a comment informing them that they were prized with "Honest Scrap."

3) List at least 10 honest things about yourself.

So here goes...

1. I was voted homecoming queen my junior year. A junior had never been voted queen…it was always a senior. I was called into the principal’s office and asked to step down for a senior to be queen, instead. So I did. I still wish to this day that I had said no to that principal. (LOL)

2. About 3 years ago, I had a two-month span of getting pulled over for speeding…I received 3 tickets, within 2 months. My 3rd ticket was for reckless driving, because I was going quite a bit faster than the speed limit.

3. In court, I begged the judge to drop the reckless driving charge and he agreed. He gave me 12 hours of community service. I was treated like a criminal. I was the only female there, as well as, the only one there for speeding. They had us cleaning the AA house, downtown...it was so gross. I was told to never go upstairs to clean by myself, because of what one of the men might do, if found alone. I was sexually harassed by the director and after turning him in, was allowed to leave, after only 8 hours of service.

4. I haven’t gone over the speed limit in 3 years. Point being…community service works.

5. I was the only girl in grade school that could get a ‘home run’ by kicking the kickball into the balcony area in the gym. I took pride in that.

6. I was a cheerleader my sophomore year in high school…I hated it. I would rather be playing the sport than cheering for it.

7. There are times when I wish that I had gone to college…though all I’ve ever wanted to be is a stay-at-home-mom.

8. When I was in grade school, I gave a boy a bloody-nose for pestering me.

9. I hope my baby girl can give a boy a bloody-nose, if ever pestered.

10. Once we have children, I would love to spend time on the mission field as a family.

I nominate the following 7 people with the Honest Scrap Award...

Shannon, Faith, Joannah, Becca, Emilie, Missy and last but not least, a newbie to blogland...show her some love...my Momma!

Love to all,
Jill

Happy Anniversary, Daddy & Momma!!

Celebrating 40 years together!


You guys are the heart & soul of our family.


We can't imagine our lives, without the two of you. You guys are a constant support, in so many ways, to me and Alex. We'll never be able to repay you for all you've done and still do.

You are loved.

Alex & Jill

Stimmin' Time! na, na, na, na...

Every morning I wake up and call Alex at work. This is our 'routine'. I like to hear his voice, before starting my day. Every morning, he kisses me bye, but I'm zonked out and have no clue when he leaves. This morning, I made the statement on the phone..."I'm so glad it's Friday." He asked why (because it's not like I work outside of the home or anything-ha!) and I said, "because it's two days closer to Sunday." I NEED my church and I need it now. Seriously, do you ever have those days where you just can't wait for Sunday to come around, so you can gather with your church family, worship, and hear the Word? This week has been one of those weeks. I always need my church, but right now, I NEED my church. TGIF!

I had my first U/S appointment, yesterday. They found a cyst in my ovary (first time for me). I find it odd that I would develop a cyst, during the 3 months that my body was going through 'menopause'. He said that it doesn't happen often, but it does happen. They did blood work. If my estrogen levels were above 100, I would have to be on a higher dose of lupron, for one more week. I really didn't want my cycle to be extended by another week. Not only because I'm starting to get very emotional, with each day that passes, but because I have tickets and hotel reservations made for this...



It's a special Living Proof Live for PW's (pastor's wives). My Mom, my S-I-L, Sara, and I, have already planned our trip to Nashville and I don't want to miss it!

I received the call from my doctor's office. My estrogen was 50, so I can continue without an extra week of lupron. YAY!! I start stimming, this weekend. This cycle, I'm on Bravelle and Menopur. They told me to mix 7 vials of Bravelle with 1 vial of Menopur. This sounds like a lot, but the nurse said it's powder, so it will definitely fit into one syringe. I'm nervous about using the powder...we used follistim, last cycle and didn't have to mix the powder stuff. Is it hard? They sent me some special cap that is supposed to help with mixing it. Vickie, you may have to come help me with the first one! It's nice having friends who are in the medical field. She was here Wednesday evening and drew my shot for me. I can't ever get the air out of the top of the needle.

Well, I'm off to get my second massage. You wouldn't think I would need it, but after the way my day ended, yesterday...I do.

Happy Friday...I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Love to all,
Jill

What's going on in my world...

I had my first massage, yesterday. It was wonderful. She did the massage on my stomach, last. It's the least comfortable, so she wanted me totally relaxed beforehand. I was. I felt light as a feather, upon leaving. If it does nothing else, it will really help with my anxiety through this cycle. Worth every penny.

I bought Alex this cd as a stocking stuffer. He has been telling me how much he enjoys listening to it, to and from work. I decided to pick up a copy for myself. It's all I've listened to, since buying it. When I leave to go get in my car, I take it with me. When I get out of my car to come inside, I bring it back in and put it in the cd player. Michael and I, have had some awesome worship time, this week. I love the entire cd. "Majesty" is one of my faves. I found myself (while cleaning the kitchen) lifting my hands in praise, singing as loud as I could. My friend, Vickie, rang the doorbell and when I answered she said, "girl, you were jammin' out." (LOL) Awesome cd...I highly recommend it.


I go in tomorrow for my first U/S appointment. Hopefully, my system will be suppressed and we will start stims over the weekend.

I want to ask you to pray for me and Alex. We have been asked to speak at a marriage retreat, this weekend. This will be the first time that we have actually shared 'our story' with a large group of people. We have shared with individuals, but never with a group like this. We're excited to have the opportunity to share what God has done in us, as individuals, as well as in our marriage. We have a heart for couples to have the best marriage possible...a God-centered marriage. Please pray for all of the couples that will be at the retreat, as well.

It was like spring outside, today. It was beautiful. I opened up all of the windows and just let the breeze flow through the house. I should have taken a picture of Diesel (our English Mastiff), today. He just sat at the kitchen window and watched me clean and sing...it was funny. I think he enjoyed the worship music as much as I did. According to BooMama, dogs need Jesus too.

I had some people ask where I bought my red ballet shoes. Well get ready for it, because you're gonna love it. Payless. It's their American Eagle brand.
I used to throw down serious cash on shoes, but since I quit work, I can't seem to bring myself to spend $150 on a pair of shoes. It thrills me to be able to find cute shoes at Target or Payless. A lot of times, I will find high end shoes at TJ Maxx and I have to admit, that still makes my heart race. I have WAY TOO MANY pairs of shoes...one day I will show you a pic of my closet. It used to be an addiction, but like I said, I'm better now that I'm a SAHW. My shoe money goes towards needles and baby drugs now and I'm cool with that.

In other news...my sister and I got the catering job! We're super excited and hope that it brings more business our way. My S-I-L, Sara, and I have started making rings...they are all made of vintage buttons (circa 1930's to 1960's). We have a small boutique that has shown interest in carrying them, so that's exciting, as well! Lots of great things going on. I'll keep you updated on how that works out.

So that's an update on what's going on in my world.

Love to all,
Jill

A God of Miracles...

I have a friend who has struggled to conceive for a couple of years now. I really believed that her IVF was going to work and when she received the negative result, I was heartbroken with her. We met through blogging and have become friends through email. I feel like she has been a cheerleader for my team and I for hers...someone who you know is praying for you, during such a difficult process. Someone who is always there to encourage you. After she received her negative result, I immediately started praying that she would become pregnant and without treatment. I just knew that God would give this precious couple a child. Well...she emailed today and guess what...SHE'S PREGNANT!! Upon reading her email, I started crying and couldn't stop. I have been waiting for that email for several months now. I told her that I was going to have such a sweet time with God, this evening, just praising Him for His goodness! (Psalm 135:1-5) My heart feels incredibly full, right now. I don't know what God you serve, but I serve a God of Miracles. "He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children." -Psalm 113:9

There are so many of you that I still cover in prayer, daily. I truly believe that God will give you the desires of your heart, in His timing. Until then, we must "...Commit our way to the LORD, trust also in Him, and He shall bring it to pass." -Psalm 37:4-5

Love to all,
Jill

All about my man...

**EDITED TO ADD**

This is a quiz about your significant other. I want Alex to take this same quiz about me and we grade one another...that would be fun(ny). :)

This is my sweetie pie...let's see how well I know him.


1.He's sitting in front of the TV, what is on the screen?
He doesn’t watch much tv. But when he does, it would be on The Dog Whisperer, ESPN, or The History Channel

2.You're out to eat; what kind of dressing does he get on his salad? Ranch

3.What's one food he doesn't like?
Tomatoes

4.You go out to eat and have a drink. What does he order?
Diet Coke

5.Where did he go to high school?
Parkview and then graduated from Heritage Christian

6.What size shoe does he wear?
12

7.If he was to collect anything, what would it be?
Bibles. I pick up around 'his chair' every day. He has SO MANY Bibles that he's always reading and referring to. I tell him that he's preparing me for our messy children, leaving their toys everywhere.

8.What kind of sandwich does he like?
Turkey with cheese, mayo, lettuce, green peppers

9.What would this person eat every day if he could?
Homemade chocolate chip cookies…ha!

10.What is his favorite cereal?
Cinnamon Toast Crunch

11.What would he never wear?
A pink shirt. *Though I’ve begged him to…pastels look great with his skin tone and dark hair*

12.What is his favorite sports team?
He loves the Razorbacks and the Cardinals.

13.Who did he vote for?
This question made me laugh. This is the 1st time in our marriage, that we didn’t vote for the same person. I’ll just say, he voted…but he didn’t vote for Obama or McCain. He has convictions that he stands for and I respect him for that. Can you say, “bailout?” LOL

14.Who is his best friend?
Me :)

15.What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn't do?
Give him advice on how to drive. *I’m doing better with this*

16.What is his favorite color?
Do men have favorite colors? I will say, blue. “Babe, what’s your favorite color?”

17.You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind of cake?
He loves his Momma’s yellow cake with homemade hot fudge sauce drizzled on top. He loves chocolate but doesn’t like chocolate cake…strange man.

18.Did he play sports in high school?
Yes, basketball.

19.What could he spend hours doing?
THIS

Sitting in his chair, reading his Bible. He wakes up doing this and goes to sleep doing this, EVERY DAY. Even over the weekend, he was sitting in the chair at the hotel, reading his Bible. He has a love for The Word and reads through the Bible at least once a year. I love this man.


20.What is one unique talent he has?
He can make me laugh, at any time he chooses...I won’t tell you how. Ha! He’s also the smartest person I know…he's brilliant at math. If he reads something, he will always remember it. I could go on and on...he can do anything he sets his mind to.

I'll let you know how many I get right. :)

How well do you know your man? Take the quiz and see!

**I missed #9. Alex said, he would eat cookies & cream ice cream, every day, if he could. So I made a 95%.

I asked Alex these questions about me...he made a 75%. Luckily we both passed...looks like we're going to make it. ha!**

Jill

Everyday is Saturday night...but I can't wait for Sunday morning!

The above title is from one of Alex's and my favorite songs. I've said this several times over, but Sunday really is my favorite day of the week. I started my morning out, running late. I find that the devil is always looking for a way to ruin our day (especially when it's the Lord's day). He seems to always find little ways to discourage me, upset me or just stress me out. He would like nothing more than for me to walk through my day in total defeat, not able to do exactly what God has called me to do that day. I find myself more sensitive to this now...I'm able to identify exactly where those feelings of discouragement, anxiety or anger are actually coming from. It allows me to shift focus (more quickly) off of MYSELF & MY feelings and back to the Lord and what it's REALLY all about. I found myself praying all the way to church, this morning. Once I walked through the doors of my church, all of those negative thoughts/feelings left me. After worship, I had the opportunity to work in the Journey infant/toddler room. At one point, I had four babies sitting in a semi-circle around me, as I fed them goldfish crackers. They were like little birds, just sitting there with their mouths open, waiting patiently on me to feed them. I found myself enjoying it thoroughly. :) We've been having visitors on a regular basis (this is always exciting and encouraging for a new church :) God has been sending us young couples and many with children. Alex and I were talking today, about how great it is to hear the sounds of children in the worship service. I heard one 'sing out', this morning, and I couldn't help but smile while singing. After church, we went to my brother's house for lunch. My S-I-L made au jus, which is one of my faves. It was so good! Thanks again, Kerri! I feel like I'm getting sick again. I don't know if it's a head cold, allergies, or what. I'm sneezing like crazy, eyes are watering, and I'm having to blow my nose every three seconds. I had three babies with runny noses, today at church. Needless to say, Germ X was our friend. :)

Alex and I had a wonderful time, Friday evening. We'll definitely be going back, before another 12 years pass. Here are a few pics from our stay...

Dinner the first night...


My Valentine...


Brunch at Ashley's...


This is the ceiling in the lobby...that's the Arkansas Capitol in the center.


Room service at 4am...my stuffy head needed hot tea.


When we arrived home on Saturday, we exchanged cards/gifts...I felt like we celebrated all weekend! It was so much fun.

He's my McSteamy :) I told him that I wanted him to take this to work and drink his coffee out of it every day. Um, yeah, he didn't go for that.


This was my present from my Valentine. It's the coolest coffee maker...it will make coffee, hot tea, hot chocolate. We've been playing with it all weekend, trying every kind of coffee and hot tea that you can think of. It's awesome.


Saturday night, I made Alex chocolate covered strawberries...he was nice of enough to share them with me. :)


And I realize that this is a pic of my feet, but I just love these shoes and had to share a pic of them. (LOL) I *heart* ballet flats. If they ever go out of style...well, I will just have to be a fashion victim and continue to wear them, because they are the best shoe on earth. I wore these on Saturday, since it was Valentine's Day...because your shoes must always go with the holiday, right? :)


And to end this post...I had my first lupron injection, tonight! **If you don't want to see a shot being administered, don't read the rest of this post.**

My sweet husband, drawing my meds...


Incase you are about to start giving yourself injections and are new to it. The key to giving yourself a lupron (SubQ) shot, is to pinch up the skin, go in at an angle and then release the skin before shooting the medicine in. You won't feel a thing!

Hopefully, that last pic doesn't bother anyone. (the only thing I find offensive about it, is the fact that it's time for a tan...look at that pale skin!) I just wish I would of had someone to share tips with me, when I first started the IVF process. I was scared to death of needles and had no idea what to expect. The first shot was painful and now I realize, it didn't have to be.

That's all for now...have a great week, y'all!

Love,
Jill

Valentine's Day...

I just love Valentine's Day. It has been so sweet, the past couple of days, seeing men in every card aisle, carrying out flowers, candy, stuffed animals. It's a day to celebrate the ones you love and I hope you have someone in your life that you can celebrate this weekend! I have sprinkled a little red and pink, all throughout the house, for the month of February.

This was my ebay find that I was so excited about! I still need to find something to go under the cloche, but I just love the red stand...it goes with my kitchen perfectly!


I mailed all of my Valentine's a couple of days ago...yes, I still send valentines to my friends and family. When I worked outside of the home (which was the case, up until 2 years ago)...I always bought valentines and candy for all of my co-workers. I would sneak it in and put it on their desk or in their mailbox, the evening before. I think it's fun to still be able to go into the store and pick out a box of valentines, like I did when I was in 3rd grade. :)


I also got my PINK SWAP item mailed off, early this week. My partner should have received it by now, so I think it's safe to post a pic...hope you liked everything, Jennifer! :)


And guess what came in the mail on Wednesday...
that's right...the big box of drugs.

Incase you were wondering, this is what $3,217.89 worth of drugs looks like...and no, they didn't throw in the KitchenAid as a bonus.


I start lupron injections on Sunday...let the baby-making begin! :)

I have a HUGE praise. I went to my massage therapist, today. Just to talk about what I'm needing, over the next month. My therapist actually owns the massage clinic. She decided several months ago, due to health reasons, to stop working for a while and just let her staff take care of her clients. She is amazing and I know all of her clients were disappointed to hear this. She loves what she does and you can tell in every massage you receive from her. It's like she has 20 hands, instead of 2...seriously...she's amazing. Well, after our talk today, she said, "you know that I'm not currently working." and I said, "yes, which of your therapist do you want me to see?" She then said, "Actually, after talking to you...I want to do your massage sessions." I of course, started crying and then she started crying. (LOL) She is truly gifted in what she does and has a huge heart for all of her patients. She always prayed with me and over me, while in session. I feel so blessed that she is going to do this for me. I will be going twice a week and it will cost the same as one session of acupuncture. Is God good or what!? :)

My Mom and her friend, Kellie were here, last night. They sing with Master Singer's of Arkansas and they had a concert in Sherwood, last night. It was an awesome concert and I was so proud of my Mama!


She's the tall, pretty one! (back row-center) :)


Me, Mama & my brother, Chris...


We went to brunch before they had to leave, this morning...


Miss Kandace got all of the attention at brunch...she's such a doll. Love that baby!


Alex and I are staying HERE for Valentine's Day. We stayed here on our wedding night, 12 (almost 13) years ago. This will be our first time back, since that day. I'm so excited!

Well, I think this post has been long enough. :) I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine's Day Weekend!!

Love to all,
Jill

I loved FIREPROOF!

Last night, was Movie Night at Journey! Before the movie started, we all just hung out and visited...


The kiddos stayed in there for the hanging out and eating part...




What would a movie be without pizza...


and sodas...


and popcorn...


and of course CANDY!!












And then they announced that the movie was about to start...






So the kiddos headed to Journey Kids...thank you, Joy, for heading that up!


I just have to brag on my S-I-L, Sara. She has painted all of our Journey Kids Rooms and is currently working on a new room for our Journey Babies. She just started, but I had to take a pic of what she has finished so far. She is so talented and we are blessed to have her! I think I will definitely need to commission her services for when it's time to decorate a nursery. :)


I loved the movie, FIREPROOF and I would say that if you haven't seen it, buy it. I had a blogger say that she didn't know how long it would take for her to get it where she lives (she's in South Africa, I believe). To that blogger, if you will email me your address, I will mail a copy to your home, there in South Africa. My treat! It's a wonderful movie and anyone who wants to see it and can't get there hands on it, I will send it to you!

Of course, I cried through a lot of the movie...thankfully they provided small packages of kleenex when you walked in. I was just thankful that I didn't make any of those awkward noises, that I tend to make when I'm trying to hold back my tears. You know the ones that I'm talking about. :)

I just can't say enough good things about this movie. Make sure you see it.

Love to all,
Jill