Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Nothing says, HAPPY HOLIDAYS like an HSG...

I went in for my 2nd HSG this afternoon. Dr. B ordered another, just to make sure that my right tube hadn't developed an infection or blockage. I need the right one to work, since it's the only one I have. I was dreading it and wanted to get it over with before the holidays and before the end of the year (for insurance purposes). The procedure was performed at a different hospital...an older hospital...but all of the staff were very friendly. I also liked it because Dr. M (one of the partners at my IF clinic) came over and did it vs. having a technician do it (like last time). We were with a different clinic the last time I had this done, so a few things were done differently. One being, the last place didn't do any type of numbing beforehand...you just had to grin and bear it...or cry and bear it was more like it. Dr. M told me he would do some numbing before inserting the dye. I was thinking they swab it with something...nope, they stick a needle directly into your cervix with some sort of numbing agent. All I have to say about that is...OH MY. The numbing helped a little, but he had trouble getting the fallopian tube to fill with dye, so he had to add a lot of pressure...that's when the water works started. I don't cry, as in sob...I just have tears running down my face uncontrollably. I always feel like a big baby but I can't help it. The cramping is fierce. He and the nurse were great and hurried through it as fast as they could. Good news is...once the tube filled, it spilled out and everything looked great! I'm now home and have taken a pain pill to help with the cramps.

I think back, before all of this infertility testing started...I used to dread having my yearly pap smear. Now those are a walk in the park compared to what they do to me at the fertility clinic. There is no such thing as modesty in infertility and sometimes it makes me cry...that everything has to be so painful. Emotionally and physically painful. Today is one of those days that as my friend, Faith says, "I'm kicking dirt." I'm sure I will be back to my 'normal' self, tomorrow...but today I just need to cry.

~J

29 comments:

elainaann said...

Oh sister! Bless your heart. Let me know if you need anything that doesn't require travelling today as I don't have my keys. :) I love you!

Mel said...

My HSG was so painful, I cried the entire time. They did not offer any kind of numbing or pain relief of any kind and the whole thing just hurt and the cramping was absolutely awful. I feel for you so much, I really do. Ugh.
I am so glad it's over and feel free to feel as sad and weepy as you want today. We ALL deserve those days from time to time, no matter the circumstances.
God never promised us a rose garden, did he?
*hugs*

Faith said...

Jill, I'm so sorry for all that you had to go through with this HSG. I have heard horror stories of how bad they are. Bless your heart. You just cry those tears, curl up on the couch and cuddle with Alex and don't feel bad about it for one minute.

I'm praying for you =)

amy said...

Jill- I'm SO THANKFUL that everything looked good! Having a HSG was the worst pain I went through with ALL my IF stuff. They gave me IB profen for my pain... that did nothing! ha! I'm praying for your pain to disappear and that God wrap His arms of comfort around you. And don't worry about the tears- EVERY time I went to the IF dr, I cried... then I'd go to my car afterward and cry some more and once I pulled it together, I'd go to Target across the street- there was always a little something there that made me feel better as I walked the isles talking to the Lord. :) You can do this!
Hugs to you!

amy said...

By the way... the word verification for my last comment was "kings"... what an awesome reminder that our KING: God Almighty is in control!

The Branches said...

awe...I know what you mean! When I was doing treatments I just felt like a turkey on a platter...but there is a light at the end of the tunnel and you will get there!

The Patterson's said...

I'm so sorry your hsg was painful. I remember some cramping afterwards, but nothing too bad (the pain medicine probably helped that). Your last part is so true though -- have a pap is nothing now compared to what we have gone through!

Polly Gamwich said...

I'm sorry you had to endure a SECOND HSG ... that's just cruel.

I hope the pain meds help.

Eric and Emily said...

The cramping was like nothing I had ever felt before, I totally get it!!!! I asked for a valium and took that for mine, it just made me not stress I was really tired, but holy moly did I wake up when the dye went in! I even grabbed some lady's arm and squeezed the crap out of it! And your right-pap smears and pretty much anything else is nothing after an HSG! Sorry you had to have another one, but glad you can be done with it and enjoy Christmas!

Jesse and Mandy Peterson said...

Ugh! This is the one test that I NEVER wanted to take. I can't believe you had to go through it twice! I was lucky enough to get out with not doing it at all, but would've been shaking in fear. My heart goes out to you in the pain and the vulnerability. I am praying for a quick recovery for you and wish you the best in the whole process. Take the time you need to heal and deal with everything.

andrea_jennine said...

I hated the HSG; definitely one of the worst parts of the whole IF work-up and treatment process. Glad your tube is all clear, though!

Sarah P said...

Oh honey. Big warm cuddles being sent to you. And the tears? You cry a river if you have to. Lots of love xxx

Lacy said...

Jill, I found your blog via Kelly's Prayer List. My husband and I are experiencing infertility too. I am so sorry to hear that your HSG was so painful, but glad that your tube is clear! After all my IF procedures I laugh (not really) when my friends complain about their annual gyno trip. Praying for you!

Jenna said...

Girl you go ahead and cry!! That sounds very painful, but I am SO glad the tube was clear. Praying for you, my friend!!!

bb and mtb said...

Man-o-man. This does not sound like a great way to spend you afternoon. I hope the cramps ease and get to snuggle w Alex this evening.

Anita said...

I am sorry you had to go through all that! So glad that the results looked good for you. Hope you start to feel better soon :-)

Joannah said...

My HSG wasn't that bad, but the first time I showed up for one they had to turn me away. I'd been on my honeymoon just days before, and no one told me to abstain from "making whoopee". So, once they ascertained that, while I was standing there in my robe, they told me I needed to come back next cycle. I started to cry then.

Anyway, I'm sorry you had such a tough time with it, and I hope you're feeling better now.

((hugs))

Rathi said...

Glad to hear that everything is clear! I had my HSG in October. I had extra-strength tylenol before and then the cramping was too bad. I was also glad that the doc hurried thru it all too! I totally understand about kicking dirt.. Holidays are a hard time to be going through these kind of doctor's trips. I go back at the beginning of January. Praying for you and here's to 2009 being our year!! Hugs!

Cassandra said...

I'm sorry that it was so yucky, but glad that the tube was all clear. At least it's all over, right?

Anonymous said...

I am praying!! I love you princess:)

twondra said...

I'm soooo sorry it was so painful. :( I hope you're feeling better now.

Witt's Family said...

praying you feel hugged so tightly by God today. praying your pain is eased.

Anonymous said...

Oh honey, I'm so sorry! I wish there was something I could do to help. I'm praying for you. :)

~Katy

I Believe in Miracles said...

I'm praying for you.
~~HUGS~~

Wishing 4 One said...

So sorry for having to endure that nasty test two times. Glad to hear dye spilled through though, thats good news. Here's hoping you are feeling better and back to your sweet, cheery self. Thinking of you! xoxoxoxox

His Doorkeeper said...

Jill, I have never left a comment but your pain just broke my heart. I pray that God will send you a baby this new year. Sometimes pain turns into joy.

James 1:2
I am praying for all you girls on Kelly's List!
Blessings to you!

Kristina said...

I was in the ER the other night for pain in my side. We were afraid it was apendix, but turned out to be ovary related, of course. The Dr. had to do a pelvic exam and the nurse that was there said "you are going to feel some pressure and it may be uncomfortable, but it will be over quickly." I contained myself, but I wanted to laugh SO hard and say "lady, you dont have ANY clue what has happened 'down there'..." I agree, there is no medesty in infertility. I'm glad that your tube was OK, but sorry for your pain. I will look forward to going back and reading your story!

Heather said...

I am so sorry for what you are having to go through, and my heart just breaks reading this. One thing I KNOW is that God doesn't mind when we have those "kickin' dirt" days...he just wants us to lay it all before Him. I have had MANY, MANY of those days. I am praying so hard for you....and praying your pain from the procedure is long gone by now.

Shannon said...

I feel for you because I know how you felt! That was one of the worst things I have ever had done. I think I cried too. :( I'm glad it is over with!